I may be out of my depth here speaking on a crucial topic that affects many marriages. What I do know is that depression can destroy a relationship. It can affect your children in later years. It can seriously damage your marriage if you don’t take drastic action.
There is help available, it could save your partner and your marriage. No one likes to talk about depression. Even in this world of medical science, we still treat it as a dirty family secret not to be aired in public. More Dads are coming forward and openly discuss how they really feel as a Dad. Read how three Dads coped with Depression
I am an ardent campaigner for parents who suffer from depression and firmly believe we should speak about it openly. I was a member of Fathers Families and Friends and raised awareness for single dads who had no access to their children.
I could not imagine what mental anguish they must have gone through when partners denied them access to their children. The pain in their eyes made me feel totally helpless. I could only listen. Many Dads I met at the group were seeking medical advice and counseling.I did a laughter session with the Dads their mood shifted a little and they looked and felt a little brighter.
I asked some of the Fathers at the group what it was like to feel depressed. Some responded that it was like a dark fog hanging over them. Others said they had no motivation to do anything. I asked them how they coped. The reply was, “We don’t, having a drink with our mates or taking a spliff makes us feel better”. Two Dads in the group contemplated suicide
During the first week of childbirth, my wife experienced the baby blues. I did not understand it at the time. It’s very hard to talk about it to your partner, especially if you did not experience depression yourself. Speaking to our family doctor helped me understand what my wife was going through. Our GP explained that women can feel low at a time when they should feel happy caring for the baby. Baby Blues are due to sudden hormonal and chemical changes that take place in your body after childbirth.
feeling emotional and irrational
bursting into tears for no apparent reason
feeling irritable or touchy
feeling depressed or anxious
All these symptoms are normal and usually only last for a few days. If you see any signs of these symptoms, please! don’t ignore it hoping it will go away, take the initiative going with her to the doctor as soon as possible.
I have included a video and links on “Feeling depressed after childbirth” courtesy of the NHS.
Guess what! Dads get the Blue Too
What! Dads get depressed…? nonsense! We are the strong head of the family and just keep going until we suffer a nervous breakdown. Depression is still taboo, we men still find it hard to talk about it. We will rather talk to a pint than talk to a doctor or a close friend. What I do know is that if you are feeling tired, irritable, useless, can’t cope with anything … get help fast and speak to your G.P fast.
I am no authority on depression and suicide and rely totally on medical journals and medical research for evidence-based facts.I did a laughter yoga exercise with the group of fathers who needed emotional support one day a weak. The moment they started to laugh the mood lifted even if it was just temporary. I would urge You to take this seriously. if you suffer from depression seek professional help asp as this could affect Your Health.
According to a report from the Daily Mail, one in five men suffers from depression after they become Dads.The newspaper quoted the authors of a study as saying that this depression is “caused by extra pressures that come from having children, such as loss of sleep and increased responsibilities”. A very brave Dad spoke openly about his depression.